For clinicians
Tips for medical professionals
When a family member dies, children are often in the room, and the adults may be too overwhelmed to focus on them. Providers can help by speaking with children at their level.
What children often wonder
- Did I make this happen? Is it my fault?
- Will I die too?
- Who will take care of me? How will this affect me?
Children may have these worries but not ask directly. Honest, age-appropriate information helps them cope. If a child asks something, answer what they are asking without adding extra detail.
Suggestions
- Before speaking with a child, talk with the caregivers about what the child already knows and what questions or worries they have. Let the caregivers set the pace.
- Ask the child what they know about how the person died. This shows you where to begin and lets you correct misunderstandings.
- Be honest and avoid euphemisms. Defer to caregivers about how much to say about the cause of death.
- Keep explanations simple and age-appropriate.
- Reassure the child that their thoughts, words or actions did not cause the death.
- Reassure the child that death is not contagious.
- Show interest in how the child is doing. Acknowledge that this is a hard time and ask about their worries and questions.
- Help the caregivers find supportive services. Ele’s Place has information for parents on helping a child cope.
Refer a family
Clinicians and funeral homes can call a branch before a parent does. Enrollment forms go only to a parent or legal guardian.
Offices open Monday–Thursday 9am–5pm, Friday 9am–1pm (Eastern). Voicemails are returned the same or next business day.
Ele’s Place is not a crisis line. If someone is in danger, call 911. If you are thinking about suicide, call or text 988.